Sunday, October 28, 2012

Shutting the door behind me


Of Jesus, it is written: “In the morning, long before dawn, He got up and left the house and went off to a lonely place and prayed there.” Mark 1:35

Without solitude, it is virtually impossible to live a spiritual life.  Solitude begins with a time and a place for God, and Him alone.  If we really believe not only that God exists but also that He is actively present in our lives– healing, teaching, and guiding– we need to set aside a time and a space to give Him our undivided attention.  Jesus says, “Go to your private room and, when you have shut your door, pray to the Father who is in that secret place.” -Henri J. M. Nouwen, Making All Things New

The nights are long and quiet when Daddy stays here. A good quiet.  I know I don’t want to think about things, because I desperately need rest so I can be perky in the morning.   so it is a gentle release, release, release of all the loose thoughts that come tumbling in.  A stillness, with just a tiny edge of alert to spring off the couch and into action.  

And as I think about this aging process, for myself and for my parents, so very personally, and in the abstract of the world around me, as each of us slides into the unwanted and unsought after, it is very clear that it too is a gift from God, one more opportunity, to release.  To admit There is a God, and I am not He.  To be led into the tiny steps and humble dependence where there is peace.

And yesterday, when Nicole called while I was juggling a bunch of almost crashing balls, we reminded each other of this truth, that peace is never from the circumstances, it is from the release.  Our trust in His masterful goodness bringing all things together, working through all things, reconciling all things to the glory of Christ.The anguish is all in my head.  

And what did He pray?

Our Father, who art in heaven, hallowed be Your Name. 
May Your kingdom come, and Your will be done, on earth as in heaven.

In each and every tiny step.

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