I will offer You a
freewill sacrifice and praise Your Name, O LORD, for it is good. Psalm 54:6
And I applied my heart to know
wisdom and to know madness and folly. I perceived that this also is but a
striving after wind. Because in much wisdom there is much grief, and increasing
knowledge results in increasing pain. Ecclesiastes 1:17-18
Jesus
said, “Truly, I say to you, there is no one who has left house or
brothers or sisters or mother or father or children or lands, for my sake
and for the gospel, who will not receive a hundredfold now
in this time, houses and brothers and sisters and mothers and children and
lands, with persecutions, and in the age to come eternal life. But many
who are first will be last, and the last first. Mark 10: 29-31
And
old Ann Voskamp has a good word today, about sacrifice and praise and good.
And the only way
to ever leave beauty marks on the world is with bits of yourself – and this will hurt. Things of realest beauty don’t bring us glory — but Him glory.
And things don’t
always work out like one sort of expects and dreams and imagines.
Remember when you were 16 with that
ridiculous hair?
And how you’d thought that by the time
you got to here, to now, it was going to be good? That by now everything would be all good.
But
I can declare what I have seen under the sun. I am hitting that stage in life
that I preface the bulk of my observations with “I am old and I have seen…” And
my students think that means that I am an ancient thirty-years-old, but it
doesn’t. And I am hoping that being old is pretty much the same this as wisdom
and experience and not so much about dark spots on my hands and a lot of grey
mixed in with that blonde. And what I
have seen is that truly releasing these glossy magazine photo ops of the way
houses and brothers and sisters and children and lands ought to be as a
freewill offering for His sake does indeed bring a hundredfold blessing. And persecution.
And much grief and increasing pain. A hundredfold.
And one longs
for that persecution to be noble and remarkable and maybe even toss in a peace
prize or two, or at the very least a Ben’s Bell, but nope.
I think bunches
of that promised persecution stuff is from Me, Myself and I as I quibble and
fuss and murmur about all of this releasing and leaving. And there isn’t a bit
of nobility about it at all, but just a great sucking out of joy.
And one of my
teacher friends at school sort of lost it this week and let loose at the kids
late in the afternoon when we were all tired and crabby and stretched thin. And
yesterday he said, “I am choosing joy no matter what,” and I said, “Me too.”
And yesterday
was full of bouncing-on-my-toes joy. Squishing sideways hugs and lots of good
eye contact and a few light bulb moments. And wry smiles peeking out from
pasted-on sneers.
Because the thing
really is: Do we ever really know which mark we make — that will matter the
most? The extraordinary things happen nowhere else but in the everyday
and today can always be the beginning:
Where
you are, with that one child, that one street, that one call, it is a noble,
Christ-called thing. It only takes one
person to change the world — and one individual, one soul, can be all your
world.
A freewill
offering and praise His name because He is good sort of joy.
Free.
Free indeed.
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