From the top of the peak, over the soft rumble of freeway traffic, you can hear a rooster crow.

Now it happened that he was praying alone, and his disciples came to him and he put this question to them, ‘Who do the crowds say I am?’

‘But you,’ he said to them, ‘who do you say I am?’ Luke 9:18,20

This is the question I rode up Sentential Peak with this morning. On my Happy Birthday Bicycle. And because it is a pretty sweet bike, I can now pass people. Going uphill. And there are a lot of cyclists out early on Sunday morning. And the other people are out there as well, the man staggering under the bridge, swinging his almost empty bottle. And the guy with the shopping cart sifting through the trash can. And the very tired looking woman sitting on the bus bench. Not that there will be a bus because the teamsters are on strike, but because it is the last bit of shade as we all squint into the rising sun. It is going to be yet another hot day in Tucson.

And of late, this has been my praying-alone question, Who is this Jesus the Christ of God? And the second is like the first, Who does the way I live my life say that He is, since I am indeed a self-proclaimed Christ-follower?

(Side note: It is so very satisfying to squish a buzzing mosquito.)

And I am reading a book that some wise friend gave me, I think for this same birthday. But I forgot whom. I thought it was Cameron, but it isn’t. So thank you, whoever you are.

And the book is a step further than my beloved Practicing the Presence of God. Because the second is like the first, Practicing the Presence of People by Mike Mason. And this is how I love the LORD my God with all of my heart, soul, mind and body, by loving my neighbor as myself.

And like Peter, I falter. A lot. And I try to rephrase the question. Or define my terms like a certain lawyer. But “likewise” is pretty clear.

By worshiping an incarnate God, we learn to humble ourselves before one another. He practices the presence of people by becoming one Himself. So too each one of us must find a way to join the human race, casting off our separateness and throwing in our lot with others. Am I paying the “continual debt of love” (Romans 13:8)? Or do I treat God’s people the civilized equivalent of the caretakers of the vineyard’s killing and beating of God’s representatives: ignoring them, isolating myself, sitting in silent judgment, rationalizing my lovelessness?

“Whatever you did not do for one of the least of these, said Jesus, you did not do for me.”

Again and again and again. This is the Law and the Prophets summed up in one question.

Do you love me?

If anyone says, “I love God,” and hates his brother, he is a liar; for he who does not love his brother whom he has seen cannot love God whom he has not seen.

And the first chapter closes with this question: Do you love God? Look at the person next to you, and you will know.

And at the top of this morning's TO DO list is to rip out all of the invasive species which have overtaken the garden.

It is to the glory my Father that you should bear much fruit, and then you will be my disciples. John 15:8

 Jesus asks Peter three times, “Do you love me?” God is waiting for us to respond. Life gives us endless opportunities for that response. But our love for Him must come first.

God wants all of our heart, all of our mind, and all of our soul. It is this unconditional and unreserved love for God that leads to the care for our neighbor, not as an activity which distracts us from God or competes with our attention to God, but as an expression of our love God who is revealed to us as the God of all people. It is in God that we find our neighbors and discover our responsibility to them. We might even say that only in God does our neighbor become a neighbor rather than an infringement upon our autonomy, and that only in and through God does service become possible. Henri Nouwen, The Loving Reminder

So I am starting to turn my thoughts to home, and the life that awaits me there. How do I take this repentance and this recentering and walk it every single day, anew? Beyond making a checklist I mean. I, being me, did make a checklist this morning. Not a TO DO list which is so very satisfying to tick off one at a time, but a TO CONSIDER list. Areas of my life to hold up to The Light and consider.

Because this is the hard step. The ruts are deep and well-worn. Thought patterns and Pavlovian systems ripple out in all directions, crisscrossing the hip-high in green new paths I wish to trod. And it isn’t calling for a backhoe scrape down to the foundational caliche. The truths are not new. But I wish to walk in freshness, with a light step. Freedom from The Accuser. Courageous joy. Rest in His centered Love. Come further up, come further in.

He will hear my voice. He will bring me safely back. God who is enthroned of old, will hear me. Psalm 55:17

O God, you have taught me to keep all Your commandments by loving You and likewise, my neighbor: Grant me the grace of your Holy Spirit, that I may be devoted to You with my whole heart and united to others with pure uncontaminated, affection; through Jesus Christ our Lord, who lives and reigns with You and the Holy Spirit, one God, for ever and ever. Amen.

drats, I missed the sunrise this morning

I suppose that could be yet another metaphor of sorts... I was sitting inside on my couch dutifully staring at a Bible verse in listening prayer... when I could have been wandering through the park wallowing in this morning's sunrise.

 Photo by Carlos Azarte

So they went out and preached that men should change their whole outlook. Mark 6:12

No eye has seen, no ear has heard, no mind has conceived what God has prepared for those who love Him- but God has revealed it to us by His Spirit. The Spirit searches all things, even the deep things of God. 1 Corinthians 2:9-10

That was the problem with the hometown folks in Nazareth. They thought they knew it all about the simple carpenter, the son of Mary, who grew up in their village. So they were deeply offended when He stepped outside of their small box, rather smashed through the invisible walls that held them from all that God had prepared for them, whom He first loved. Whom He was calling to love Him.

So Lord Jesus, into what small boxes have I placed you? So small that I don’t see what You have prepared outside of my conceiving?

And this Helper that You promised, this Comforter, Who is to reveal all things? Someone to stand by me, to be with me always? The Spirit of truth; He is with me now and is in my heart. You said that I will not be left alone in the world—that You have come to me.

And to this Jesus replied, “When a man loves me, he follows my teaching. Then my Father will love him, and we will come to that man and make our home within him. 

I leave behind with you—peace; I give you my own peace and my gift is nothing like the peace of this world. You must not be distressed and you must not be daunted. 

Do you love me, Peter?

You know I do.

Then feed my sheep.

• • •

And, well, maybe you need to get outside more often and look at My sunrise. To celebrate this changed outlook.