This point of intersection is the point of intersection of the branches of the Cross. –Simone Weil

For the LORD God is both sun and shield; He will give grace and glory. Psalm 84:10

To You, O LORD, I lift up my soul; my God, I put my trust in You; let me not be humiliated. Psalm 25:1

verb (used with object), humiliated, humiliating.

1.to cause (a person) a painful loss of pride, self-respect, or dignity; mortify.

So I met with the other English Language Arts teachers yesterday during seventh period, and asked how I could best support them, because actually my writing class is an extra supplement to the regular curriculum. I listed the ream of ELA standards (new ones were approved by the Arizona Legislature just last month since they know so much about instruction and the classroom; basically they just erased “Common Core” off the top of each sheet of paper) and they leapt onto “Parts of Speech.”

And anyone who knows Mrs. Voelkel knows that she does parts of speech, and actually she loves parts of speech, particularly the diagramming bit because it is so neat and tidy and thus, satisfying.

Really the main reason for teaching, or reminding, eighth graders of the parts of speech is so they will be able to correctly use nominative and objective (and possessive) pronouns, because not so many people can do that.

And the Psalmist begs God to protect him from being humiliated.

Which is different from humble yourself (and He will lift you up), even though both of them are transitive verbs with the same direct object, me, because humble yourself is a reflexive verb.

And as much as they tried, the crowds, the religious leaders and the Roman soldiers were unable to humiliate Jesus. They were unable to shake or take His dignity, because He had already laid it aside.

Simone Weil paints a picture of the nail of affliction as being “a marvel of divine technique.”

It is a simple and ingenious device which introduces into the soul of a finite creature the immensity of force, blind, brutal, and cold. The infinite distance which separates God from the creature is entirely concentrated into one point to pierce the soul in its centre…In this marvelous dimension the soul, without leaving the place and the instant where the body to which it is united is situated, can cross the totality of space and time and come into the very presence of God.

If I lift up my soul to Him, and He nestles it within His bosom, as a mother bird shields her young, no one can mortify me all day long.

Because I am His, His beloved, and He is mine.

And Miriam took the boy’s head and laid it upon her lap, and they gazed up together at the sky and the stars and how they shed God’s mercy upon all.

Jesus said: “Everyone who says a word against the Son of man will be forgiven, but no one who blasphemes against the Holy Spirit will be forgiven.” Luke 12:10

The achingly true humility of Christ. Of Yeshua. Of Him who in the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. He was in the beginning with God. Of Him who all things were made through Him, and without Him was not any thing made that was made. Of Him in Whom was life, and the life was the light of men. The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it.

And I confess that several times a day some ugliness wells up in me, and I feel like shaking one of my screaming kiddos and asking, “Excuse me. Do you have any idea to whom you are talking to like that?”

But I am to remain under, even as He remained under. He who did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but emptied Himself. Emptied Himself of everything except love.

Humbled Himself. As we are to humble ourselves. Myself. A choice.

And where did these little eleven and twelve year-old-children learn to react to any and all stimuli with virulent profanity? And I feel so gawky in my affection, clumsily tripping into open wounds.

Yesterday this girl walked into my room during lunch carrying a big box. “Mrs. Voelkel?”

I thought I said with a smile, “Yo!” However she heard a sneer and a “No,” and screamed all of her words all across the patio and would not be consoled no matter how much I knelt down next to her.

And yesterday things got ugly in first period and one of the kids hit the monitor button but by the time she showed up everyone was sitting quietly in their seats and sort of on task. But later that afternoon two kids filled out forms on each other that they had been verbally threatened, so I was told to fill out a report on the incident on who was involved and I had a list of eighteen names including the two normally pretty good boys pounding on the table screaming “Fight, fight!” and how could I have sent all of them to the principal’s office? And what would that have done? So I had talked them down one at a time, and gotten each of them sharpened pencils and evaluation rubrics and trying to live life one step at time, releasing and forgiving and not even noticing when others do you wrong.

But I don’t think that is policy.

And last night I read more of the Asch’s fictional account of the boy Yeshua as he lay on the roof of his house with his face upturned, watching the stars kindling in the sky. Beyond those glimmering lights heaven was filled with its own life. The Patriarchs were there, and David the King with his crown and lyre, and Yeshua closed his eyes to see them better, them and the celestial chariot which upheld the throne of glory, and the Seraphim; he heard the chant of the earth surging through the ether to expire faintly in the far reaches of the sky, and mingling with the chant, men’s tears and supplications arriving at the gates of heaven. And Yeshua’s thoughts returned to the fettering of Isaac. He thought what he would do in Isaac’s place. He tried to visualize himself laden with the wood that was to burn him as an offering. Would he be willing, as Isaac had been, to go meekly to his slaughter?

That my light might shine in the darkness, and the darkness will not overcome it.

And yesterday this little skinny guy hung around after second period and tried to comfort me and sharpen more pencils. No one is allowed to bring backpacks to school the last week so I need lots of pencils. And the thing is about Office Depot brand pencils is that they always break. Even when kids are not snapping them in two and throwing them across the room.

And he is one of those kids who have to move every three months because I am guessing his mom and her boyfriend don’t pay rent. And he has moved seven times since his mom got this new boyfriend. And this is the second-best school he has been in. And he says that everyone thinks he is pretty much an asshole, especially at home. And we had a really good talk about God’s merciful love and everyone’s backstories and he handed me a paper towel to wipe my nose and brought me a melted eegee from a class party during sixth period.

And when I have time I am going to watch the ASCD 2015 symposium of Addressing Poverty as a Sector, as a School and as a Classroom. For the first time in recent history, the majority of public school children in the United States come from low socioeconomic households, according to the Southern Education Foundation.

But until then, I will choose. Humble yourself in the sight of the LORD.

And Miriam took the boy’s head and laid it upon her lap, and they gazed up together at the sky and the stars and how they shed God’s mercy upon all.

That my light might shine in the darkness, and the darkness will not overcome it.

Once again, brand new seating charts

Call to Worship

Trust in the Lord forever, for the Lord God is an everlasting rock. For He has humbled the inhabitants of the height, the lofty city. He lays it low, lays it low to the ground, casts it to the dust. The foot tramples it, the feet of the poor, the steps of the needy.  Isaiah 26:4-7

Contemplation

Bartimaeus, a blind beggar, the son of Timaeus, was sitting by the roadside. And when he heard that it was Jesus of Nazareth, he began to cry out and say, “Jesus, Son of David, have mercy on me!” And many rebuked him, telling him to be silent. But he cried out all the more, “Son of David, have mercy on me!” And Jesus stopped and said, “Call him.” Mark 10:47-49

Closing Prayer

Humble my heart before Thee, and replenish it with Thy choicest gifts.

LORD, You know each name; You know each need. Help me to so fix my heart on You, be so attentive to Your voice and heart, that I might share Your understanding knowing.

It is my only hope.  

 They reeled and staggered like drunkards and were at their wits’ end. Then they cried to the LORD in their trouble, and He delivered them from their distress. He stilled the storm to a whisper and quieted the waves of the sea. Then they were glad because of the calm, and He brought them to the harbor they were bound for. Psalm 107:25-28

And I said, “Oh, that I had wings like a dove!

Trust (lean on, rely on, and be confident) in the Lord and do good; so shall you dwell in the land and feed surely on His faithfulness, and truly you shall be fed.

Delight yourself also in the Lord, and He will give you the desires and secret petitions of your heart.

Commit your way to the Lord [roll and repose each care of your load on Him]; trust (lean on, rely on, and be confident) also in Him and He will bring it to pass.

And He will make your uprightness and right standing with God go forth as the light, and your justice and right as [the shining sun of] the noonday.

Be still and rest in the Lord; wait for Him and patiently lean yourself upon Him. Psalm 37:3-7

Prayer: Abba Father, I bow my knee to your supreme authority in my life. You are the Potter, I am the clay. Make what You will.

Trust. Dwell. Delight. Commit. Be. Rest.

What are the desires and secret petitions of my heart?

Unconditional love and purpose.

That is the longing in each of our hearts. To be known and to know. I was made by God for relationship with Himself and others, and made for meaningful impact on His world for God and with God.

Prayer: Grant me, O Lord, to trust in You with all my heart; for, as You always resist the proud who confide in their own strength, so You never forsake those who make their boast of Your mercy; through Jesus Christ our Lord, who lives and reigns with You and the Holy Spirit, one God, now and for ever. Amen.

Bind them around my neck.

Nada hagáis por egoísmo o por vanagloria, sino que con actitud humilde cada uno de vosotros considere al otro como más importante que a sí mismo, no buscando cada uno sus propios intereses, sino más bien los intereses de los demás. Filipenses 2:3-4

Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others. Philippians 2:3-4

According to the Greek, Philippians 1:27 actually says, “Only behave as citizens worthy of the gospel of Christ…” thus let us not allow our public dialogue distract from the message of God’s love and Christ’s death and resurrection. This is what matters, and any sidebars from this message most likely is not from God. This plea for unity is followed by a promise that we will indeed suffer for His sake, so let us not cling to our “rights” but have the mind of Christ, who did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but emptied himself, by taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men. And being found in human form, He humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross.

This morning I read an article in Christianity Today by John D. Anazu entitled, “Religious Freedom vs. LGBT Rights: It’s complicated.” And he does a good job reminding us that we Americans are citizens in a pluralistic society, and that Pluralism rests on three interrelated aspirations: tolerance, humility, and patience. And while we American Christians fret and strain at relative gnats and smugly glance over at the bloody non-pluralism taking place in Sudan and Iraq and Palestine, let us be reminded that Jesus (and John and Leviticus as well) very clearly teaches that according to our Heavenly Father, if we hate our brother in our heart we are a murderer. And he spells it out fairly clearly, and repeats Himself if we can’t hear so well, “But I say to you that everyone who is angry with his brother will be liable to judgment; whoever insults his brother will be liable to the council; and whoever says, ‘You fool!’ will be liable to the hell of fire,” lest we judge one another.

And really the best thing about my summer writing course is the absolute pluralism present in the class. They managed to collect students, teachers and professors from absolutely every walk of life from here in Tucson, Arizona. And we are absolutely free, even required to discuss any and all topics with tolerance, humility and patience, and we practice it all day long. And since my nametag reads Desert CHRISTIAN School, I am very aware that every word I say, every word I write, every word I speak in my eyes and every word I inflect with my tone reflects on the gospel of Jesus Christ, I have a pretty high bar looming in front of me five days a week, seven hours a day. And this is a privilege and a challenge to not be distracted from the three that remain: faith, hope and love. And the greatest of these is love.

May I prove worthy.