The will to obey.

Deep calls to deep

    at the roar of your waterfalls;
all your breakers and your waves
    have gone over me.
By day the Lord commands His steadfast love,
    and at night His song is with me,
    a prayer to the God of my life. Psalm 42:7-8

Oh the deep, deep love of Jesus 
Vast, unmeasured, boundless, free 
Rolling as a mighty ocean 
In its fullness over me.

Lord, we pray not to get lost in the reality of our own depravity, but rather to find ourselves morning by morning in the light of Your mercy and redemption. Amen

New every morning, great is Thy faithfulness.

I shall not want, when I taste Your goodness.

When I am bowed down with sorrow I will lift up Your name

And the foxes in the vineyard will not steal my joy,

For You are good to me, good to me,

And I lift my eyes to the hills from where my heart is from

Your goodness and Your mercy shall follow me all of my life

I trust in Your goodness,

I trust in Your promise.

You liberate me from my own noise and my own chaos

From the chains of a lesser law You set me free

In the silence of the heart You speak

And it there that I will know You and You know me

You satisfy me till I am quiet and confident

In the work of the Spirit I cannot see.

In the silence of the heart You speak.

So yesterday momma and I helped out at the Interfaith Packathon, two hundredish people at the Muslim Community Center measuring exactly 388-390 grams of rice and beans dried vegetables and vitamins and spices into then sealed bags, 50,000 meals. And the event began with prayer, and there was a break for the two o’clock prayers as well.

And the heart-piercingly beautiful call to worship brought back so many memories of dusty skies over wide rivers.

And as the men knelt down on spread out carpets, I joined them in their prayer: Dear LORD God of heaven and earth, please reveal Yourself.  And may we have eyes to see and ears to hear.  And the will to obey. 

Dear LORD God of heaven and earth, here I am once again.

And I find myself much like Meg and Jo in Little Women, murmuring about once again shouldering the daily burdens after the holidays, “Oh, dear, how hard it does seem to take up our packs and go on,” sighed Meg the morning after the party, for now the holidays were over, the week of merrymaking did not fit her for going on easily with the tasks of every day life.

And me, huh. I had two weeks of beyond-imagination merrymaking, full of dinner parties and bouquets by my bedside from my beautiful sister, and parties and a lovely drive home and reading and resting and not working, because washing dishes is not work.

But of course, good old Marmee spoke truth into the story, “We are never too old for this, my dear, because it is a play we are playing all the time in one way or another. Our burdens are here, our road is before us, and the longing for goodness and happiness is the guide that leads us through many troubles and mistakes to the peace which is a true Celestial City.”

The will to obey.

Audrey Assad has sung truth into my morning as well.

You dwell in the songs that we are singing,
Rising to the Heavens, rising to Your heart, Your heart.
Our praises filling up the spaces
In between our frailty and everything You are
You are the keeper of my heart

And I'm restless, I'm restless
'Til I rest in You, 'til I rest in You
I am restless, I'm restless
'Til I rest in You, 'til I rest in You
Oh God, I wanna rest in You

The peace.

And because momma and I are a little crazy, we start off Sundays eating breakfast together over the both the New York Times and The Arizona Daily Star, and then we go on over to Trinity Presbyterian for the breaking of the bread and the passing of the peace, before we head off to our other places of worship.

The peace.

May it be so.

How many times does He whisper to me, New every morning, great is My faithfulness?

Show me Your marvelous loving-kindness, O Savior of those who take refuge at Your right hand from those who rise up against them. Keep me as the apple of your eye; hide me under the shadow of Your wings. Psalm 17:7-8

So I was talking to someone a couple of days ago about His lovingkindness. And is it the sort of thing of seeing, really seeing His face, His marvelous light, regardless of circumstances, and tucking up under a sweeping wing of shelter against the storm of life?

And someone could even accuse the small counting game as distracting or minimalizing His glory.

·       A hug from swim team Laura because my day was going to be hard.

·       Marco telling my student that even though the connection for Skype interview about Collective Efficacy for Diabetes Management was terrible that Alicia felt supercool. That made a big difference in her rather discouraged life. And she is really worried about her nana with diabetes who has to take insulin shots every day now.

·       That Eliseo had a great interview with the director for his project that he is doing with Herite on how to increase students doing homework. And Josephine King from Doolen said that she would do anything for me, even answer an interview from Herite. And last year Eliseo hated refugees.

·       And actually Levi Pratt who was a student of mine a long, long time ago because now he is in graduate school said he would do an expert interview as well, on how to build a hovercraft out of plywood because that is what he did in eighth grade. Along time ago. And I found him on Facebook.

·       For Facebook invitations and all of the people that I love who are coming to the Adam birthday party tonight and who have pressed the green accept checkmark.

·       Once again for Panchita and Judy. The house is nice and clean and smells just like Pinosol.

·       For Jack Voelkel and Pippen bringing over the just-read newspaper every single morning to remind me of what faithfulness looks like every single morning.

·       That for some crazy reason the kids love to take out the black garbage bags and recycles with me every day after lunch, out to the smelly, stinky alley. And all of the construction workers say hello.

·       For the very cool awards Alan made for the Robotics Club.

·       For getting to decorate a Christmas tree with Everette this morning.

·       That really I LIKE shopping at Fry’s. Which is a good thing since I go there about four times a week. But it is one of the few things that I know that I do really, really well. That and doing dishes. And I am going as soon as I finish this quiet time.

·       For brand-new goggles for free that do not leak, and I get to write an Amazon review for them for Austin, who thinks that my Masters swim team has some of the nicest people.

·       That I swim on such a nice Masters team.

·       That the wall is providing work for Rogelio and Carlos and that it is going to be beautiful.

·       That I get to introduce Manuel to the wonders of thrift stores today as we try and find some pants for him for the Winter Dance tonight. Maybe at Buffalo Exchange.

·       Wow. For Buffalo Exchange. Wow. I have spent so many hours there, pleasant hours since a long time ago when it opened when I was in high school. And I bought my clothes there. And the baby clothes there. And the little girl clothes. And the big high school girl clothes. And now I am going with Manuel this morning.

·       For the backside of envelopes that I get to pull out of the trash and write down all of these TO DO lists. That I get to draw lines through tasks completed. And yes, I am one of those people who sometimes writes down tasks completed, like Christmas Gifts Drawing and then crossing it off because it is done. And I am also going to try and visit Uncle Jim with my momma as well.

·       For these off-white knit blankets that wash up so nicely and warmly wrap around every single morning.

·       For the Mexico Outreach jacket that I somehow “won” when they drew names, and who ever wins things that way? But now I have it to remind me every single day of one of the happiest places in my life.

·       For my wonderful fireplace and all of the firewood stacked up out front and I am going to empty the ashes this morning too.

·       That the term Loving-kindness (or "lovingkindness") was coined by Myles Coverdale in his Coverdale Bible of 1533, as an English translation of the Hebrew word chesed  (which appears in the Latin Vulgate as “misericordia” in that text it is spelled "louinge kyndnesse.”

But my list is a reminder, again and again, that His glorious lovingkindness is everywhere, revealed everywhere, as He works His good purpose.

And right now I have some problems seeing His face when I listen to CBS nightly news. That part of the mirror seems really blurry to me now.

But I can look at my feet poking out from underneath the off-white knit blanket.

·       For the black Tom’s boots from Heather that I wear every day now. And I want to thank You one more time for my thoughtful, wise daughters.

Thank you for once again opening my eyes that I might see the wonders of Your love.

Lovingkindness.

I like it better as one word, even though spellcheck doesn’t.

Amen.

His love is new every morning

“To the one who is victorious, who carries out my work to the end... I will give him the honour of sitting beside me on my throne, just as I myself have won the victory and have taken my seat beside my Father on his throne. Let the listener hear what the Spirit says to the Churches.” Revelation 3:22

The letters to the Churches are intended as both a clarification and encouragement in the face of difficulties and confusion. And over and over again words of the Holy One Who Is True are “I know you. I know both your triumphs and your weaknesses. Remain firm. Remain focused on what is of value and refuse to be sidetracked. Endure and you will be victorious.”

But what is even more important is the reminder over and over again, that He is victorious. The battle has been won. It is finished.

And this fills me with courage as each day I kneel down this morning and take up my cross, and follow Him.

Let the listener hear what the Spirit says to the Churches.