So it has been pouring rain in the dry desert of my soul, buckets.

Do not behave as those who have other gods. Deuteronomy12:31

Deep calls to deep. In the roar of the waterfall in a dry and thirsty land. Psalm 42:7 I in me and you in Me, ask.  Ask and it will be given to thee.

And it is raining down on Tucson. On a dry thirsty land. Like never before the drops are turning into puddles are turning into pools are turning into streams are turning into rivers. Rivers of living water. 

It has been a full week, and I am not quite sure the exact moment when God reached in and healed the hole in my heart, but He did. And now it is my job to walk it out. That the world will see His love in me.

And back and forth and back and forth in the pool. And my swimming friend asked about the Chinese guy while we were kicking. And I told how I wrapped my arms around him two days ago and prayed for hope and grace and wisdom and he wept and said thank you. And we talked about how cool Wali is and John is.

And when we were hanging out in the hot showers, she asked if I was with a church, is that why I had so many kids live with me. And I said, well no, I am just on the open door hit list. And she asked if I would go out for coffee with her. For the first time in seven eight nine years. It is a dry and thirsty land.

And I hugged another girl yesterday and reminded her that I prayed for her every Friday. And she she asked if I would share my little Scripture verse thingies with her again every day. It is a dry and thirsty land.

And story after story is walking across the stage about God’s power and love. Walked out. For He has not given us the Spirit of fear but of love.

And today's speaker, Bob Hazlett loves to read AW Tozer. As do I. I have tasted of your goodness. It has satisfied me and left me hungry for more. I long to be filled with more longing. Begin in mercy and begin a new love in me.

Jesus died to restore our souls, healed in every way. The soul becomes the bridge between the mind and heart. My soul thirsts for You in a dry and thirsty land.

What happens when our soul is redeemed? I am not just to be a hearer, but a doer. Faith activates what grace empowers. I am called to walk in constant awareness of Who God Is.

The wrong answer is from Satan, an offense to Me, for it is not mindful of the things of God, but the things of men. Get behind me thinking the way that seems right to a man that leads to death.

Jesus came to crush the lie. Satan tells us lies, and when we believe them they can take over. Your time is up. The lie must leave in Jesus’ name. Only do what the Father does. Say what the Father says. Think what the Father thinks. The Evil One steals, murders, seeking whom to destroy.

Active listening: talking to God, asking and listening, asking and listening. It’s a conversation, not just to you, but with you. Keep asking, keep knocking, keep seeking.

So we paired up. And I paired up with this Jewish guy with a blue scarf on his head. So Jonathan from Michigan, who is just randomly here all by himself because he really doesn’t like charismatics but then he prayed for a guy and saw the legs straighten out in his hands so he is going to find out more, just prophesied over me. And said I was a teacher. Duh. And that God would use me to bring people in a dry thirsty land to an oasis, a place of great refreshment. A great city.

God I thank you that perfect love casts out fear. Let me see with Your eyes. Thank you for Your grace and freedom. Every mountain low and valley high. Let me hear the Voice from above and walk in obedience and walk in love. 

Selah as last.

Sighs too deep for words

And Peter said to them, “Repent and be baptized every one of you in the name of Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of your sins, and you will receive the gift of the Holy Spirit.  For the promise is for you and for your children and for all who are far off, everyone whom the Lord our God calls to himself.” And with many other words he bore witness and continued to exhort them, saying, “Save yourselves from this crooked generation.” Acts 2:38-40

Repent.  

The Greek word metanoia is better translated as “turning around” or to “going beyond the mind.” The call to an utterly new mind, to turn around and begin again, is the essential and necessary pattern that insures ongoing spiritual growth. (Rohr)

This crooked generation is focused on fears, angers, judgements; my thinking determines what I will see and what I won’t see, what I pay attention to and what I don’t.  My running-thought prayers are so often fixed on self, not on His grace and freedom.  And His love.  Which is the ultimate Truth, the new and living way that He opened for us through the curtain, that is, through His flesh.

Therefore, let me draw near with a true heart in full assurance of faith. In His love, His perfect love, fear is cast out.

The worldview is that everything out there is against me.  It is a worldview in which we compare, dominate, control and insure.  I am in charge.  I need to be in charge, which leads to anxiety and isolation.  I sort of hate the books I am supposed to be teaching this next school year because they just reinforce this rugged individualism which is the lie from the garden.  You can be god.  

Take control of every thought so you can pray. 

And by resting in His forgiveness, I can truly forgive each and every one, near and far off.  It is not my job to judge.  Rather I shall join Paul, bowing before the Father.

For this reason I bow my knees before the Father, from whom every family in heaven and on earth is named, that according to the riches of His glory He may grant you to be strengthened with power through His Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith--that you, being rooted and grounded in love, may have strength to comprehend with all the saints what is the breadth and length and height and depth, and to know the love of Christ that surpasses knowledge, that you may be filled with all the fullness of God. Now to Him who is able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think, according to the power at work within us, to Him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, forever and ever. Amen.

This was the verse pinned to my bulletin board behind my teacher desk at Grace.  That every day I knelt down and prayed for my awkward seventh graders.  Oh, to have it scaffold my heart and prayers yet again.

Repent.

Amen.