a smear of ash across my forehead

Remember O Man, dust thou art; and unto dust thou shalt return.

“Even now,” declares the Lord,

“return to me with all your heart,

with fasting and weeping and mourning.

Rend your heart

and not your garments.

Return to the Lord your God,

for He is gracious and compassionate,

slow to anger and abounding in love.” Joel 2:12-13

O LORD rend my heart. Rip it open that it may lie exposed to Your gracious and compassionate light.

An abounding love flame that purges all lies and all fear and all doubt.

May I live in Your Truth, with all my heart, now purified.

The Lord replied:

“I am sending you grain, new wine and olive oil,

enough to satisfy you fully.

The trees are bearing their fruit;

the fig tree and the vine yield their riches.

for He has given you the autumn rains

because He is faithful.

Come Lord Jesus come.

All who are thirsty.
All who are weak.
Just come to the fountain
Dip your heart in the
stream of life.

Let the pain and the sorrow
Be washed away.
In the waves of His mercy
As the deep cries
out to you.

We said
Come Lord Jesus
Come.
Come Lord Jesus
Come.

All who are thirsty
All who are weak.
Just come to the fountain
Dip your heart in the
stream of life.

Won't you come?
Won't you come?
Nothing but your love for Me.
I am ever faithful to you.

Won't you come?
Won't you come?
Nothing but your love for Me.
I am ever faithful to you.

Because He is faithful.

Brushing the dust off of my knees

But it shall not be so among you. But whoever would be great among you must be your servant, and whoever would be first among you must be slave of all. For even the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.” Mark 10:43-45

Not exactly the verse I was looking for today. I was more hoping along the lines of Come unto me, all you weary and you laden. (btw thank you Cameron for being the soundtrack to my life.)

Be strong and let your heart take courage, all you who wait for the LORD. Psalm 31:24

You strengthen me more and more; you enfold me and comfort me. Psalm 71:21

I imagine as Jesus walked down the road to Jerusalem, walking ahead of his both amazed and frightened disciples and followers, His heart was comforted by the Psalms, the soundtrack of His life.

And the whole thing about the journey to Jerusalem is that it is one step at a time. And let me strengthened and comforted by the LORD. He is faithful.

And when the path gets a little rocky the Christy of me want to grab back control. But I must remember that moment of joy when I shouted, “It is the Lord!” and leapt out of the boat. 

And I don’t want to be like James and John who mostly wanted to fast forward past Jerusalem and discuss the seating arrangements at the big table, who is sitting where, and to settle into the journey itself, the picking up the cross bit and the kneeling and washing feet bit.

One of my student-friends just spent some time walking part of El Camino de Santiago. And she fell and couldn’t finish it out. But that’s ok. She has bunches of beauty and glory tucked inside her heart now.

And so the day begins. At my doorstep. Come unto Me, all you weary and you wired, and be.

Splish, splash, once again overflowing

And Jesus looked around and said to His disciples, “How difficult it will be for those who have wealth to enter the kingdom of God!”  And the disciples were amazed at His words. But Jesus said to them again, “Children, how difficult it is to enter the kingdom of God! It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich person to enter the kingdom of God.” Mark 10:23-25

I so totally get it. How hard it is to release. Of our own free volition.

And for some reason this led my thoughts to the Tower of Babel. And gave me a tiny glimpse into the heart of God that He was not afraid of what man might do, unhindered, but rather He knows that unhindered, our thoughts do not turn to Him nor truth. We get totally tangled up in the Serpent’s Lie that we are like God.  And although my heart breaks as I read of the war and rumors of war that still spin out from this confusion, it is nothing like the brokenheartedness of God when we walk away from Him sorrowfully because we have great possessions.

The brokenheartedness that made a way for each one, for with man it is impossible, but with God, all things are possible.

Tales from a Troubled Land by Alan Paton is sliding around my dashboard and needs to be returned to Wilmot Murphy Public Library.  I borrowed it for Uncle Jim over a month ago. And I remember the last time it rained in Tucson, I was returning a book to the library and God met me in the form of a weeping woman huddled up underneath the book drop slot.

And I prayed a prayer that I wouldn’t walk away the next time.

And Saturday The LORD God Almighty plastered a rainbow across the afternoon sky.

He is faithful.

Sitting on the kitchen counter drinking tea

Jesus looked steadily at him, and His heart warmed towards him. Then He said, “There is one thing you still want. Go and sell everything you have, give the money away to the poor—you will have riches in Heaven. And then come back and follow Me.” Mark 10:21

So there have been a lot of long talks into the night the past few days. Well, mostly listens. I have been listening to the stories of someone who has, not through any choice of her own, well some of the choices were hers, and some of them not, and the point is that she had an awful lot of it chopped away. All of the stuff of life that we put confidence in: our cleverness, our connections, our beauty, our hard work ethic. Everything.  

And that is what He wants. He wants us to step out of the robes that weigh us down and so easily entangle and follow Him who being in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but made Himself nothing, taking the form of a servant and becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross.

And there is enough pain to go around. Thank you NPR for brightening my morning with the interview with a prosecutor in child abuse cases. And the Russian and Ukrainian brink of disaster. And the student-led protests in Venezuela. And the strapping young man living in the back room is having a rough weekend too, and really all I can do is hug him and say that I care. And Uncle Jim who came over for soup and raisin bread has to look in the mirror and decide what to do with the man looking back.

And in the midst of it all, I am struck by Jesus, who looked at the rich young ruler and loved him. He saw through all of the clutter and saw His child.

And when it was all said and done, that is what gives courage to my newest houseguest. That He cares. Through it all.

And whatever it is that I lack, that I want, that still impedes, may I let go, give it all away. And I like the bit about becoming obedient as in a present progressive process. And then the clutter will be gone and I will be able to see the children of God. Everyone.

And it’s kind of interesting that in the English language, as I explained to my students this week, that everyone is singular. This one. And this one. And that one.  And the Powerpoint that I was using, created by an undoubtedly frustrated college professor whose students arrived not understanding all that stuff about pronoun case and pronoun agreement had a slide with a spinning globe that said: Everyone on Earth = more than one person—billions of people, in fact. The word everyone, however, is still singular.

And needs a singular verb.

And God so loved everyone that He gave His only Son, the Verb.