For God alone my soul in silence waits; truly, my hope is in
Him. Psalm 62:6
Remember Your word to Your servant, because You have given me
hope. This is my comfort in my trouble,
that Your promise gives me life.
Psalm 119:49–50
Far overhead beyond
the veil of blue sky which hid them the stars sang again; a pure, cold,
difficult music.
For what you see and hear depends a good deal from where you are
standing: it also depends on what sort of person you are. Now the trouble about
trying to make yourself stupider than you really are is that very often you
succeed. He (Uncle Andrew) soon did hear nothing but roaring in Aslan’s song.
Soon he couldn’t have heard anything else even if he had wanted to. Such a
horrid, bloodthirsty din of hungry and angry brutes he had never heard in his
life. If they want to throw away their own lives, that’s their business. But
what about me?
They don’t seem to think of that. No one ever thinks of me.
So yesterday
afternoon Everette and I practiced the word “splashing.” She was in her little
swimming pool with an odd collection of small cups, a pail for pouring on her
belly, a rag for scrubbing and even a paintbrush. And she would splash hard,
and I would say the word “splashing,” and then she would splash again. And we
had been bending our necks like a giraffe and pounding our chests like a
gorilla and waving our arms like a monkey all afternoon.
And I am in a world
of silence. Except for the splashing of water on the plants as I water. Which
gives me a great opportunity to choose where to stand. And I can choose to
stand under the blue veil of stars singing a pure, cold, difficult song. Or
not.
And the ground was
bubbling up with life and dark firs and primroses while Polly listened to His
song, and heard the things He was making up and then looking around and seeing
them, she had no time to be afraid.
But Uncle Andrew
wanted to creep away to a rat’s hole.
So like Miss
Courage-of-a-Wild-Boar Everette and Miss No-Time-to-Be-Afraid Polly I want to
notice what He is about. Eucharist always precedes the miracle.
And let me add to the list
on my computer desktop, the list of 1000 gifts: The abundant flowers on the
little desk, the birthday note on orange construction paper, the friends who
arrived with crackers and veggies and hummus and Brie with pomegranate seeds
and prayers, cups of dense Nescafe, the metallic spin of the air conditioner, Mary
Beth’s charcoal sketches of the desert, long walks around Reid Park, a bag of
finch seed strung outside the window, fresh new grass pushing up through hard
desert dirt that needs a little extra watering, and Far away, down near the horizon, the sky began to turn grey.
A light wind, very fresh, began to stir.
Truly,
my hope is in Him.
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