I am willing.

Satisfy us by your loving-kindness in the morning; so shall we rejoice and be glad all the days of our life.

Five years ago I came to believe in Christ’s teaching, and my life suddenly changed...and suddenly I heard the words of Christ and understood them, and instead of despair I experienced happiness and the joy of life. –Count Leo Tolstoy

Romans 12:2 says that we "are transformed by the renewal of the mind.”

The word repentance in the Greek, the word metanoia, literally means "change mind.”

One of the major keys to every issue in my life was it needed me to repent. It needed me to stop looking at the situation from my perspective and start looking at it from God's. -Phil Drysdale

I am rereading Phil Drysdale’s Renewing Your Mind. He tackles Romans in a way that rings true with my soul and now Romans is a glorious declaration of freedom rather than my childhood perception of finger-waggling by a crabby old man. It is a celebration of the cross’s power. We are dead to sin and alive in Christ. The struggle is over.

It is finished. This is what is true.

Dear Father in heaven, grant Your Spirit to us, Your children. May something from You be revealed on earth so that divine strength and divine truth, not what is only human, are with us in all we do. Keep courage alive in our hearts even when things look dark. May powers of peace and healing be revealed through us because You are near and Your kingdom is all around us. You can do all things, also things beyond our understanding. With Your help we do what we are able, but we cannot do what You do. We trust in You, and we believe that through Your power and Your Spirit You will take possession of our whole lives and the lives of the many who sigh in their hearts for absolute truth. Amen.

And as I drove back and forth this morning, I changed the words to the song: My mind is Yours, my mind is Yours, for the making. Oh LORD.

The disciples asked Jesus, ‘Increase our faith.’ The Lord replied, ‘If you had faith like a mustard seed you could say to this mulberry tree, “Be uprooted and planted in the sea,” and it would obey you.’

Lord, increase our faith.

Take possession of my whole life. My heart. My soul. And my mind.

To the quick

Let my cry come before you, O LORD; give me understanding, according to Your word.

Let my supplication come before You; deliver me, according to Your promise. Psalm 119:169-170

Sometimes those lightening bolts from heaven strike. The ones we plead for, the ones for understanding.

And, well, sometimes they pierce like a sword into the heart, slice and dice, and reveal what has been hidden.  And it can be humbling. This in-sight, seeing inside and the sin that lays there, putrefying, poisoning quietly and steadily.

And this morning the prayer of Search me, O God, and know my heart; Try me and know my anxious thoughts; see if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting turned into a spotlight beam.

And wow, I don’t even know how to begin to making things right, where the path of reconciliation will lead; right now it seems pretty hopeless.

But at least I know where it begins. Right now, confession. Because not only is He faithful and just and cleansing, but He is merciful. And in Him is my trust. My trust alone.

And ol’ Phil Drysdale, the guy going through a hard time as well, reminds himself and me and all of us what is true: If you want to rediscover your joy and peace the first step is placing your hope firmly in the one who is unchangingly good and is for you in every way.

Answer me when I call, O God, defender of my cause; you set me free when I am hard-pressed; have mercy on me and hear my prayer. Know that the LORD does wonders for the faithful when I call upon the LORD, He will hear me. Tremble, then, and do not sin; speak to your heart in silence upon your bed. Lift up the light of your countenance upon us, O LORD. You have put gladness in my heart, more than when grain and wine and oil increase. I lie down in peace; at once I fall asleep; for only you, LORD, make me dwell in safety. Psalm 4

Brother Lawrence always did his best resting in front of a pile of dirty dishes

Mercy and truth have met together; righteousness and peace have kissed each other. Psalm 85:10

Jesus taught us, saying: “Be compassionate just as your Father is compassionate. Do not judge, and you will not be judged; do not condemn, and you will not be condemned; forgive, and you will be forgiven. Give, and there will be gifts for you: a full measure, pressed down, shaken together, and overflowing, will be poured into your lap; because the standard you use will be the standard used for you.” Luke 6:36-38

May Your kingdom come, and Your will be done, on earth as in heaven.

The sweet spot.

Mercy looks straight into the eyes and yet releases. He who created my innermost being, who knit me together in my mother’s womb offers lifted-up-arms mercy.  What is set right as to a plumb line can yet sit down under a tree together and share a bit of bread and wine…just as your Father in heaven is compassionate.

And there are those moments. The rest moments.  The pause, You-Are-God deep breaths and look up at the billowing sky shot taken by Annissa. 

And Phil Drysdale reminds us of Max's maxim, "It's not about me."What a heart-lightening truth.

And a few days ago a friend sent me a morning prayer, that God would “fill you with the knowledge of His will through all the wisdom and understanding that the Spirit gives.”  And although the path is not clear, and I sometimes feel like I am being pelted with dirt clods, one thing is clear, His wisdom. His wisdom is peaceable, gentle, open to reason, full of mercy and good fruits, impartial and sincere.

And that is a nice tidy checklist where I can live rest today.

Double, double, toil and trouble

August 10, 2014

I labored more abundantly than they all, yet not I, but the grace of God which was with me. 1 Corinthians 15:10

Yet not I.

It is not about me toiling and striving to improving my world: the relationships, the situations, or even myself. It is very clear that I have done a flat-out lousy job of that over the years.

It is about me throwing out the lies that so entangle me and pressing into the truth that I am a beloved child of God. And the biggest and fattest lie is that it is about me and my work, when it is really all about Him who is at work in me. I am not God.

And, well, I think it is very useful to face this lie that I have believed and confess how I have acted from this lie, and repent and release those areas of my life to His loving Spirit, I can do this from a position of safety and peace, from His arms, from His grace.

And the truth is that it is He who produces the fruit that endures, and my only job is to be a willing branch on his vine, soaking up the sun and rain, and opening myself up to his pulsing life. This is the life of My yoke is easy and My burden is light.  I am at rest in His faithfulness and power. And most of all His-leaving-the-ninety-and-nine love.

Stand back and be amazed.

Prayer:

Thank you Jesus that you said that your burden is light and your yoke is easy.

Help me to experience that. Help me to evaluate my day-to-day life and spot the areas which are not light and easy. Help me give back to you what I have taken upon myself. 

Help me to recognize that fruit is not my responsibility but it’s yours and you have only given me one responsibility: to listen to your voice and believe, to embrace that gift of faith which comes from hearing.

Excerpt From: Phil Drysdale. “Renew Your Mind in 30 Days.” iBooks.

Dribbling down my neck

Señor, pon guarda a mi boca;
vigila la puerta de mis labios.
No dejes que mi corazón se incline a nada malo,
Que el justo me hiera con bondad y me reprenda;
es aceite sobre la cabeza; Salmo 141, 3-5

Set watch before my mouth, O LORD, and guard the door of my lips; let not my heart incline to any living thing. Let me not be occupied in wickedness with evildoers; Let the righteous smite me in friendly rebuke; it is oil for my head; let my head not refuse it.  Psalm 141:3-4

Yet it was kind of you to share my trouble. Philippians 4:14

Show me Your ways, O LORD, and teach me Your paths. Lead me in Your truth and teach me, for You are the God of my salvation; in You have I trusted all the day long. Psalm 25:3–4

As for the part in the rich soil, this is people with a noble and generous heart who have heard the word and take it to themselves and yield a harvest through their perseverance. Luke 8:15

I will remember the works of the LORD, and call to mind Your wonders of old time. I will meditate on all Your acts and ponder Your mighty deeds. Psalm 77:11–12

Almighty God, the fountain of all wisdom, you know my necessities before I ask and my ignorance in asking: Have compassion on my weakness, and mercifully give me those things which for my unworthiness I dare not, and for my blindness I cannot ask; through the worthiness of your Son Jesus Christ my Lord, who lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit, one God, now and for ever. Amen.

Well today is my day to sit on the “Potter’s Wheel” and have a kindhearted group of brothers and sisters sort through my life for two and a half hours and look for lies that I have believed and areas of my life that need to be entrusted over to our Loving Father. 

And once again, providentially, the lectio divina Scripture prayers for this morning have spoken deeply to my heart and mind. As to what is true as I prepare for the reproof, encouragement, and correction.

And this discipline is such a gracious gift from God, the beauty of praying Scriptures throughout the day, joining the Church across the globe around the clock, the rhythms of God at work in His beloved creation.

And what is true is that the Evil One is the Father of Lies, seeking to destroy and damage anything and everything beloved by God. And may I meditate on what is true and rest in that perfect peace.

And Phil Driscoll discusses this peace of God today, “I had to let go of my need to understand, and trust that God understood the situation better than I did. Not only that, but He cared about the circumstance and wanted to see me get through it, even more than I did. When I embraced those truths I found peace come flooding back into my life, not for a day or a week or even a month. It’s a peace that lasts forever.”

“God help me to let go of my need to understand everything. Help me to trust in your voice and your promises, that I would lean on your understanding and not mine.

Thank you for your abiding peace that is ever with me and will never leave me.”

To our God and Father be glory forever and ever. Amen.

Happy.

Por nada estéis afanosos; antes bien, en todo, mediante oración y súplica con acción de gracias, sean dadas a conocer vuestras peticiones delante de Dios. Y la paz de Dios, que sobrepasa todo entendimiento, guardará vuestros corazones y vuestras mentes en Cristo Jesús. Filepenses 4,6-7

Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:6-7

I am reading Phil Drysdale again, Renew Your Mind in 30 Days. The main thrust of the book is that “Repentance is the process of discovering what God says is the truth and aligning your faith with His.

 “We see over and over again the apostle Paul state that while grace has been given in full it can only be accessed through faith. This highlights that, while God has given us something, our trusting (having faith) in that gift is what allows us to enjoy it.

To have the truth set you free is one thing, but to know you have been set free is a whole other story.”

And this morning my supplication was that I would live in this freedom. And really, my heart and mind feel bathed in the peace of God.

Off to a new day.